How have four days already passed since the
last blog post? Time is flying by; it’s crazy and makes me a little bit sad but
at the same time it makes me appreciate the time I have left here even more. I
can’t believe that within just a bit over 3 weeks I will be back in the desert
heat of Abu Dhabi. I just want to remember it all, but I’m 86.5% sure that
that’s impossible… weirdly, I think I’ll miss the sounds the most; the sound of
Pooja, the monsoon rain, my Yogi neighbors’ nighttime chanting, the sound of
the birds as they eat the left over offerings, the chirping of my pet cricket
who lives in an unknown location in my room, the sound of Baloo barking, the
early morning Hindi music being blasted by the villagers, the farmers in the
paddy field next to the monastery singing their tribal songs, the list goes on
and on and on… I guess when I’m back in Abu Dhabi the hum of the AC will have
to do, although I think that hearing the call to prayer from the mosque again
will make me very, very happy!
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| George, Pat, Bhupi and I taking a final picture with Lewis, who left Tuesday |
Okay, back to all the updates of the past
four days. I spent all of Monday and Tuesday at the VIN office. Bhupi is still
having problems with the lack of new volunteers during the next few months and
is stressed out; I figured I could spend the next two days helping out as much
as possible. And yep, as soon as I entered the building Bhupi came to find me,
he really thinks I’m some graphic design genius and has asked me whether I
could make the annual report looks ‘spectacular’… Next George came to find me, he
and Pat are working on the document which describes all of VIN’s activities, and
it will be sent to various locations around the world. I offered to help them
with that too and ended up doing that for the rest of Tuesday. This was
frequently interrupted by Pat calling me crazy for using my day off to work,
but really, I’d rather help out Bhupi in his time of need than go sightseeing…
They ended up letting me sleep in the office on the couch. It is also where
George sleeps because he is the Volunteer Coordinator (he has the king’s room
though with a bath with jets for bubbles!!!). We ended up going for dinner at
“Yummy’s”. I had Pokoda, of course, and accidently ordered cheese (didn’t know
that paneer was cheese… woops) so I brought that home for the dogs. George is so
great to talk to, he’s so wise and totally like an uncle to all of us… what a
cool guy.
Also, the new intake of volunteers have
arrived; 6 people, and of course I don’t remember half of their names… there
are five girls, Liesbeth (almost shed a tear when I heard her name because it’s
my mom’s name) who is from Belgium and who I can speak Dutch to! Lex, who is a
yoga instructor from the US and who is taking over Rachel and Colten’s position
at the Mahayana monastery; I’m so glad that the kids won’t be stranded!
Stephanie, a girl who is also from the US, who is super sassy and the new baby
of the group (I have lost my position…) and 3 French people whose names I of
course, forgot (partly because they were so tough to pronounce, don’t be mad at
me!!!).
I spent the lunch times with Isuda in the kitchen where she showed me how to make parathas (OH MY!!!) and tomato pickle (the un-spicy version). She is already planning my next visit to her house, where I will learn how to make cel-roti (a dessert) a blog post on that as soon as it happens!
At the end of Tuesday I had finally finished the document for George and was ready to take the work ordered by Bhupi back to the monastery. Isuda was done with work so we walked to find busses together, she waited for me to find a bus, we said goodbye and then I was off, back home. I really consider the monastery my home now… Because I moved around so much as a kid I really don’t feel like any one place is my home. Okay, I was born in England but I only lived there for 2 months, hardly a home. I grew up partly in Holland but I feel so un-Dutch that when I go back there during the summers I feel more like a tourist than a local. I’ve lived in the UAE for a long while and sort of feel like that is my home but I am nowhere near Emirati… so basically I dread the moment when people ask me where I’m from, because I don’t even have a clue myself. I don’t feel that connection to a specific country which I recognize as ‘home’ and because of that anywhere where I am is my home… I mean, I even called Hotel Premium my home after I’d only been there for two nights… yeah
The last few days have been normal days filled with classes. The monks are so cute; I can’t even handle it sometimes. When I got back to the monastery I was greeted by excited “Zizi! Zizi!”’s and during dinner was told “I missed you ma’am!” by so many smiling faces! I showed them the 10 elephant Polaroids and they all wanted a detailed account of all the animals I’d seen… and all were equally disappointed when I confessed that I had seen no tigers.
When I walked into class the next morning
we all realized that someone had written “Quiet Lama boys sweet” on the class
room door and to my surprise half of the class started rapping “Soulja boy”
with “Lama” instead of “Soulja”… of course laughter ensued and I was briefly
transported back to my 2008 rap phase. These little moments are the ones I’ll
miss.
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| Posing with Ganesh! (thanks Houde family!!!) |
We’re almost done with the posters and they
are becoming more and more elaborate, the monks have let go and are decorating
the entire poster (not the white paper I’d stuck on for drawing). The drawings
of the mountain background of the Fox poster have crossed from the white paper
onto the purple paper far behind the title and all the writing. Lotus flowers
and drawings of stars and hearts are all over the papers. The way the monks
work so hard on them just makes me want to shed a tear; they are becoming more
and more creative!
The older class’s biography writing is also
going spiffingly… we always have the best time because they all have such a
good sense of humor. Yesterday when we were writing about “life now” including
hobbies and friends two of the monks played a joke on me and handed me this;
Of course endless laughing ensued. But the
time when I truly laughed the most was today, when we were still working on the
“life now” section… one of the monks was writing about his partner’s best
friend, who is the guy who rapped his song the first day, remember? Anyway, so
he was writing about his hobbies and showed me his work; in big letters “he is
always raping”… I tried so hard not to laugh at this but I did. And within
seconds my laughter attracted the rest of the students who all came to look;
some of them knew what it meant and explained it to the one who made the big
mistake, he then burst out in laughter and we all spent the next 5 minutes
laughing like fools. Oh these moments… I’m so glad that the monks have such a
sense of humor, it just makes every day better.
Okay, when I started writing this blog post
I wasn’t planning on writing about this but now I feel like I should..................................................
I have taken refuge. As of now I am a Buddhist. I wasn’t even planning it this
morning when I went to class, but around the 8:42 am mark something hit me, it
felt right and I just blurted it out, semi-interrupting Tulku Jigme “I WANT TO
TAKE REFUGE”… He was so accepting, smiling and then I ruined the moment by
starting – you guessed it – to cry. Tulku Jigme reassured me that it is okay,
that this is just a way of me expressing my happiness; which it probably was, I
don’t know half the time. So yes, he said that it was alright… so I left and
thought that was it.
Then today after I got back from having
some tea in the village Ngodup called me over… “Zizi, Tulku Jigme 4 o’clock” …okay?
Nervously I walked to my room wondering what has going to happen.
Five minutes later Ngodup came to visit my
room and told me that he needs to teach me how to do the Chak (which are these
special movements). So there in my tiny room I was doing the exercises (which
are done to show respect). Then at 4:00 pm I anxiously and excitedly walked
over to Tulku Jigme’s house. I entered and was led upstairs, I had never been
upstairs – we usually meet in the living room – so this was already very
exciting for me. I entered the room which had a paintings and pictures of
enlightened ones all around and got even more excited. Then it was time for me
to do the chak thanking baby Jesus (am I still allowed to say that? Wait.) that
Ngodup had come to teach me I successfully did them. Then Tulku Jigme invited
me to sit down next to him. We talked about taking refuge and then he started
reading the Tibetan texts on taking refuge, translating them as we went along.
I was listening super carefully, taking mental notes all along.
Then he told me to repeat after him, I was
speaking Tibetan! I had to repeat the vow three times, the third time being the
most important as that was me accepting Tulku Jigme as my teacher and putting
my faith in the Buddha, Dharma and Sanga (Buddha, his teachings and my Lama
Brothers). It felt amazing. He then cut off a piece of my hair (I currently
look real stylish; kidding, it was only a teeny tiny bit) which he instructed
me to throw into the river, a symbol of letting go. He gave me a Tibetan name,
which I feel a bit weird about sharing for some reason, but I will anyway; Jigme
Lhamo, which means Fearless Goddess/Angel, woah. And then he gave me a gift;
Buddhist prayer beads, and I could’ve shed yet another tear. As I was sitting
there, slightly overwhelmed with it all, I felt so extremely happy and
grateful… When I got back I crashed down in my room and just lay there for a
good 20 minutes, this was followed by a massive headache (??) which I still
currently have.
I truly don’t have enough words to express
how blessed and humbled I feel.
I don’t know why I am sharing this with you
all; I am a relatively private person with these type of things, but it
wouldn’t feel right to keep this hidden…
Really, all I have is gratefulness for it
all
Charlotte x
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